What Type of Gay Are You?
Answer these questions and we'll guess if you're a twink, a bear, an otter or defy categorization altogether.
You're new significant other is coming over for dinner. What do you cook?
Steak and beer
Salad, lightly dressed with Rosé and candy
Salmon with asparagus and mashed potatoes
Pasta and steamed vegetables
How important is hair removal to you?
One single hair on my body can induce enough dysphoria to inspire 1000 morose poems
The harrier the better
Too much slows me down, so I like to keep it trim
Not that important, as long as everything is under control
What's the first thing you do after sex?
Go to the bathroom
Lay back and decompress
Cuddle and pillow talk
Make a drink or smoke something
Which of the following best describes your relationship with the gym?
Everyday is cardio day
Do you even lift, bro?
A necessary evil
I get enough exercise without the gym
If you were stranded on a desert island and could only bring one of the following things, which would you choose?
Enema kit
Flaregun
1 gallon of hard liquor
Assorted stack of 90s Vogue magazines
Which of the following is your spirit animal?
Poodle
Otter
Gorilla
Grizzly
Lion
Puma
Which of the following is the most important factor in a romantic partner?
If he's got a big dick
If he's got a good body
If he's strong and confident
If he's got good hair
If he seems cute and innocent
If he can play rough
Which of the following is the most important factor in a romantic partner?
If he's got a big dick
If he's got a good body
If he's strong and confident
If he's got good hair
If he seems cute and innocent
If he can play rough
Which of the following is the most important factor in a romantic partner?
If he's got a big dick
If he's got a good body
If he's strong and confident
If he's got good hair
If he seems cute and innocent
If he can play rough
Twink
Not only are you a twink, but you're a real twink's twink. You're skinny, fem, and have delicious ass. You're at least the best bottom in town, if not the whole state.
Otter
You're in otter-mode. Maybe once a twink, you've since transformed, thanks to some muscle definition and strategically placed chest hairs. If you're fit and have put on just enough gains for this sexy aesthetic.
Jock
Great game out there, sport. Peel off that sweaty jockstrap, because your a disciplined hunky jock. Remember, there's not "I" in team. ;)
Bear
Fee-fi-fo-fum! I smell the fur of a bear! Winter must finally be over, because evidently the grizzlies are on the hunt. ;) You're a big, lovable, furry bear.
Daddy
Wowie zowie, you're the definition of Daddy. Spank me, reprimand me, pay for meals. I'm not sure if I want you to fuck me or legally adopt me.
Cub
You're an adorable cub. One day you'll grow up into a big bear, but for the time being you're a furry plaything to keep cuddlers warm on cold winter nights.
