The Infernal Houses
Are you reading Anton LaVey's "The Satanic Witch" or Dr Robert Johnson's "The Satanic Warlock"? Do you wish they had spiced things up by adding Hogwards style houses inspired by the Four Crowned Princes of Hell? Wow! Me too! Take this deeply psychological quiz to determine which of these houses you would be sorted into.
What traditional element do you associate with most closely?
Fire
Earth
Water
Air
Psychodrama is a thing of the past. We have real magic now! What type do you specialize in?
Whatever is strongest. It's magic. I'm in it for the skill and power.
Divination and the study of ancient runes and languages.
Illustions and empathic links. I want to use both to my advantage.
Shapeshifting. It feels the most flexible, and sometimes you just want to escape the world.
You are allowed to choose any animal for your familiar! You decide to adopt...
A cunning falcon.
An agile snake.
A bold black goat.
A protective wolf.
You have come across Headmaster LaVey's secret storeroom of magical artifacts, and he lets you take one with you as you begin a grand magical journey! You choose...
A lantern that can brighten and dim on command, and which reveals that which has been hidden.
A key which can unlock anything merely by tapping it to the surface of any lock, chains, or door.
A glittering sapphire earing that whispers to you the surface thoughts and strong emotions of those around you.
A ruby amulet that is said to grant the bearer great power, but at high risk to any who attempt to weild it.
Headmaster LaVey says that he wants you to try adding a wand to your rituals. Of the four presented to you, you select...
An ebony wand that's warm to the touch with power and spits sparks when you pick it up.
The curling wand of ivy wood that was carved by a wise scholar long ago.
A wand carved from driftwood that's said to be beloved by those who specialize in illusions and charms.
The heavy oak wand with a crystal tip that is said to have a mind of its own.
You have been instructed in all the means of magical transportation, and now it's time to choose your favourited method!
I ride dragons, bitches. Seriously, why even have other options?
I can teleport in the blink of an eye, even through walls and past magical wards.
I enchanted my own broom, which can be hidden away in the corner of my study when not used.
I transform into whatever animal suits my needs, like a bird to cover large distances or a fish to explore the oceans.
You've concocted your first potion! What did you make?
A dark, frothing drink that tastes bitter but greatly improves your luck and magical prowess for hours at a time.
A tea made from pale leaves that lets you understand any language, no matter how old and forgotten.
A deep blue, inky tincture that makes people more easy to manipulate and sharpens your powers of observation.
A fruity, syrupy concoction that can turn you invisible for hours with only a few drops.
You knew we would ask eventually. What's your Hogwarts house? Be truthful now...
Gryffindor
Slytherin
Ravenclaw
Hufflepuff
Sun or Moon?
Sun
Moon
Now that you're a real witch or warlock, how do you dress?
In a way that intimidates, but that's not new.
Embroidered robes and enchanted amulets. I'm a traditionalist.
I choose something mysterious and flattering.
I'm going to dress the same as I always did, you losers.
You're now a master magician! What title are you granted?
The Bold
The Wise
The Tempter
The Unyielding
Pen or Sword?
Pen
Sword
How do you identify in real life?
Atheist Satanist, LaVeyan or otherwise.
Luciferian. Wow, I wonder what this one gives me.
Theistic Satanist
Eclectic
Satan
You were sorted into Satan's House, home of the adversaries! Your house colours are red and black, and your house crest is an inverted pentacle wreathed in flame. Your quarters are located in the South Wing of the Infernal School of Witchcraft and Sorcery.
Remember, stubborn is just the coward's word for determined!
Remember, stubborn is just the coward's word for determined!
Lucifer
You were sorted into Lucifer's House, home of the enlightened! Your house colours are white and gold, and your house crest is a stylized torch. Your quarters are located in the East Wing of the Infernal School of Witchcraft and Sorcery.
Remember, if you ever look ignorant, the Christians win!
Remember, if you ever look ignorant, the Christians win!
Leviathan
You were sorted into Laviathan's House, home of the passionate! Your house colours are blue and silver, and your house crest is an oroborus. Your quarters are located in the West Wing of the Infernal School of Witchcraft and Sorcery.
Remember, if you're not a hedonist you're a frigid puritan!
Remember, if you're not a hedonist you're a frigid puritan!
Belial
You were sorted into Belial's House, home of the independent! Your house colours are green and bronze, and your house crest is a broken chain. Your quarters are located in the North Wing of the Infernal School of Witchcraft and Sorcery.
Always remember: No gods! No masters!
Always remember: No gods! No masters!
